People Recent events meant that the Conservative leadership contest all but disappeared into a new black hole -- the only sign being that some other bald person is now pontificating in a blue tie. I was reminded of the only time I met a Conservative in person. I was at a small but perfectly formed Waterstones, and who should be there signing copies of his memoirs, but Michael Heseltine. I could tell it was him, because amid his agent, bookshop rep and security guard, not a soul was around. Actually to be fair to the book chain, the shop was packed, but there was just no one around him. He sat dejectedly behind his desk in the window chatting politely to the rep and glancing now and then at his ex-voters striding past not giving him a second glance – or looking like they were trying not to. And in the twenty minutes it took me not to find the book I was looking for, his only visitor was a Young Conservative who looked for all the world like Nigella Lawson. I thought about approaching just to see what he was like, put to be honest I also had more fun walking past him...

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