This column's about open calls and attend auditions which aren't a perfect fit. In the midst of which we have:
"On one occasion, despite knowing I am not an ideal fit, I decide to audition for a musical about hookers in the wild west and dress accordingly. I wear a very low cut top, showing a fair amount of cleavage ..."
Hello, secret actress. I was right all along.
Of course, The Guardian style guide prefers to ungender, so utilises "actor" much to the chagrin of commenters on most interviews with women in the profession, despite the fact as even the Wikipedia acknowledges:
"After 1660 in England, when women first appeared on stage, actor and actress were initially used interchangeably for female performers, but later, influenced by the French actrice, actress became the usual term. The etymology is a simple derivation from actor with ess added. The word actor refers to a person who acts regardless of gender, and this term "is increasingly preferred", although actress, referring specifically to a female person who acts, "remains in general use". Within the profession, however, the re-adoption of the neutral term dates to the 1950s–60s, the post-war period when women's contribution to cultural life in general was being re-evaluated. Actress remains the common term used in major acting awards given to female recipients."So for the purposes of this exploration she'll remain the secret actor, because The Guardian says so.
Meanwhile, because this is an anecdote, and because it does have some specificity about it, it's the best column yet and has a funny punchline.
It still feels like it's Romola Garai but admittedly looking at her biography the timings don't fit. Minnie Driver? Gemma Arterton?
As for the show? I've asked the Twitter hive mind. I'll update this if I get any responses.
This is important because a timing could be extrapolated. The assistant of the director of this was just about to tour Winnie the Pooh. Is it the Disney Live version?