Blog! My nightly trawl through the internet for the best of blogs leads me through some strange corners. I've tried to keep this site fairly wide-ranging (and that seems to be working - my average hit number is growing weekly) -- but many sites simply offer the lives of their writers. I've tried to offer sites which are particularly unusual, or extemely well written or offer a glimpse into a life you'll never lead. Which is why I'm happy to point y'all towards Speaking in Tongues, the new jointlog of Sophie and Basil, who seem to be writing to each other or to no one in particular which makes it deeply compelling for reasons I can't quite decide. Perhaps it's the halting openness.
Music Tara Palmer Tompkinson lists her top five classical pieces. Strange seeing Zadok The Priest in there, which I've actually sang for the Queen (I've been about a bit you know). The Queen was visiting Liverpool one day during my last year at secondary school. Someone decided it would be good idea to fill the Anglican Cathedral with school kids and have them sing Handel very loudly, whilst other kids offered a martial arts demonstration. We practiced solidly for two weeks, frequently after school and on the day the big church looked a treat, and even though we had all rehearsed separately, all of the schools sounded epic. And even the anti-royalists amongst us (of which I'm on the edge) were excited about meeting her majesty. So the time came and we began to perform -- and she walked past us, not batting an eyelid -- not that she could miss us. She seemed more engaged with the flowers she'd collected on her way past us. Perhaps she isn't as big a fan of Handel as Tarapt (appear twice in her top five) -- but many of us never forgave her for the slight...
Architecture Rachel Whiteread's 'House' despite protestations to the local cancel by the art world, was always going to be a temporary structure. The latest momentary vignette features an architect who's structure was designed to be far from temporary until it was destroyed by the ultimate act of 'vandalism'.
People Recent events meant that the Conservative leadership contest all but disappeared into a new black hole -- the only sign being that some other bald person is now pontificating in a blue tie. I was reminded of the only time I met a Conservative in person. I was at a small but perfectly formed Waterstones, and who should be there signing copies of his memoirs, but Michael Heseltine. I could tell it was him, because amid his agent, bookshop rep and security guard, not a soul was around. Actually to be fair to the book chain, the shop was packed, but there was just no one around him. He sat dejectedly behind his desk in the window chatting politely to the rep and glancing now and then at his ex-voters striding past not giving him a second glance – or looking like they were trying not to. And in the twenty minutes it took me not to find the book I was looking for, his only visitor was a Young Conservative who looked for all the world like Nigella Lawson. I thought about approaching just to see what he was like, put to be honest I also had more fun walking past him...
Music Catatonia is catatonic...and many other tabloid headlines will ensue. Anyone who saw Cerys fawning over PAUL CLARKE! on 'Big Brother's Little Brother' those few short weeks ago will have known it was on the cards. Cerys seemed at best loopy, at worst deeply fragile. Looks like Gorki's Zygotic Mynci are Wale's number one band again. About time too...
Chat Chatalyst is like Metafilter without topics or Matt Haughey. I used to haunt here and a few other chatrooms quite I lot when I first went on-line, but gave up as the average conversation would be:
feelinglistless enters the room...
Devil666: Hey feelinglistless
feelinglistless: Hello
Devil666: m/f, age, locale...
Which seems fine - except if there are twenty people there and they all say this at the same time it tends to shorten the chances of anything constuctive. The most fun is logging in via multiple browsers and having a surreal conversation with yourself and seeing how the other 'chatters' react. My favourite ever quote on-line was when I logged in as JFK and Jackie-O and had a marital dispute. It went ignored for ten minutes, until suddenly someone from nowhere said: "What's with all the kennedys?" Chatalyst is at least worth a visit then, to see how people are connecting in the darker corners of the net...
feelinglistless enters the room...
Devil666: Hey feelinglistless
feelinglistless: Hello
Devil666: m/f, age, locale...
Which seems fine - except if there are twenty people there and they all say this at the same time it tends to shorten the chances of anything constuctive. The most fun is logging in via multiple browsers and having a surreal conversation with yourself and seeing how the other 'chatters' react. My favourite ever quote on-line was when I logged in as JFK and Jackie-O and had a marital dispute. It went ignored for ten minutes, until suddenly someone from nowhere said: "What's with all the kennedys?" Chatalyst is at least worth a visit then, to see how people are connecting in the darker corners of the net...
Librarianship At Salon, archival articles are grouped under particular subject headings. It's refreshing, yet slightly surreal to find a page for New York City so devoid of the latest news...
Blog! skomsvold I would easily have included for the name. Would even include it for the reliance of green on black, something I miss from telneting the internet at college. I'm actually including it for the new entry about alcoholism -- which is some of the best none-WTC weblog writing I've read in days. Tomorrow 1995.
Dreams I remembered my dream for the first time in a long while the other night. I had gone to the old cinema which features in many of my dreams, a cinema which doesn't exist. I'd gone to see a French film which as far as can gather doesn't exist. I was the only one there (which is unusual, as the place is usually filled with everyone I've ever met). At the end I visited the box office to buy a ticket for the next showing to find the actress Laura Fraser working behind the counter (recent star of 'A Knights Tale', biggest film to date 'Virtual Sexuality'). She was leaving and I followed. We walked across a derelict urban wasteland. I asked her what she doing working in a box office and she told me it was because whilst she enjoyed acting she still wanted to have a normal life. I smiled. And as we walked we began to hold hands. She invited me to her house -- a giant shared accomodation in the middle of a large city which appeared from nowhere. I stood on the step and told her I had to go. We kissed, but she pulled away, because I didn't know how to kiss her -- and she disappeared into the house without another word -- I followed her in and the scene merged into a road and I was suddenly on the back of bicycle being pedalled along by the Python Eric Idle (now not then) dodging cars at an endless series of crossroads -- and then I woke ... what the hell does all that mean?
Drink Hey everyone, something of quandary. Whenever you don't have time to blog, should you write an entry to say that you don't have time to blog, who simply not blog? Either way, I'm going out to the pub, and so well ... you'll have to look elsewhere for your enlightenment. Try one from the list of 'happenings' to the bottom right, or take a chance with the webrings on the bottom left ... I'm sure you'll find something at least a bit funny...
History The 80s Sever presents the hyperlink essay, "Children Of The Eighties" by Bryant Adkins. It's mostly American but there are one or two things I can relate to: "On weeknights Daisy Duke was my future wife. I was going to own the General Lee and shoot dynamite arrows out the back. Why did they weld the doors shut?"
Music Liam Gallagher offers his usual rational response to International politics: "I ain't fucking going to New York again. I'm never going to America again man. I'm staying put. I ain't getting on a plane for a long time." Oasis never made it in America, did they?
Blog! out of order feels like sleeping Annie finally wrote something new yesterday. She reminds us of how our memories of a thing or place are amplified when it's changed or not even there anymore. "But New York, I feel like she belongs to me, shared with millions of other people. Everybody has his or her New York, and it will never be the same for any of us." Which reminds me -- we haven't heard from Woody Allen...
Art During it's recent refurbishment Tate Britain tried a noble experiment. Forgoing the traditional chronological hanging method, they grouped the pictures into themes. This had the effect of taking the works from their original contexts. In the past few weeks, they've back tracked somewhat, and there are now galleries dedicated to single artists. How dull.
Books I’d forgotten I was going to see Dave Gorman read from his new book 'Are you Dave Gorman?' tonight. Or rather I’d forgotten until yesterday, when I remembered. As always when deciding these things, I have to weigh up whether its worth staying late in Manchester in the knowledge that I won’t be home by ten o’clock, and I’ve been trepidatious about visiting these Waterstones readings in the past – but I decided that as this was a personality I was onto a good thing.
The arts section had been done out in flimsy plastic chairs for occasion. The room filled and eventually a man looking for all the worlds like the ‘It’s…’ character in Monty Python approached from the side and spoke in a voice entirely familiar to fans of Droopy: “Thank you for coming to this reading at Waterstones. Tonight we have Dave Gorman and his friend Danny Wallace reading from their book. So let’s welcome Dave Gorman and Danny Wallace.”
There is something about almost famous people in person. They’re not larger than life characters to begin with, and so when you meet them, it’s a bit like seeing someone at a party. And so it went. Strangely Danny Wallace (who sat silently during the TV series) had as much to say as Dave Gorman, perhaps making up for lost time. Luckily, they are both automatically funny and so were able to paper over cracks in the presentation.
We were aware from the beginning that Dave would not be doing stand-up – he really would be reading from a book. Amusingly, the audience got to choose between the actual book, a DIY handbook and a book about Heraldry. Luckily for them we chose their book (it would have taken a Herculean moment for anything else) and the two set about reading.
The first section dealt with their first meeting and subsequently how the bet began. For those not in the know, this consisted of Gorman betting Wallace that he could find fifty-four Dave Gormans, including the jokers. A fool task, entirely paid for on a credit card, but instant material for the comedian. Both were clear readers, Gorman’s writing in particular mirroring his stand-up delivery. Wallace’s words exude his obvious journalistic background. The second section, chosen at random spoke of the Israeli Dave Gorman – somewhat prescient.
As if to prove that you can’t get away from anything in the Q&A section, the mood darkened as someone asked why Gorman had cancelled a gig at The Lowery Gallery. It was because he was flying to New York for a six week run in an off-off-Broadway theatre in the seclusion zone....
The arts section had been done out in flimsy plastic chairs for occasion. The room filled and eventually a man looking for all the worlds like the ‘It’s…’ character in Monty Python approached from the side and spoke in a voice entirely familiar to fans of Droopy: “Thank you for coming to this reading at Waterstones. Tonight we have Dave Gorman and his friend Danny Wallace reading from their book. So let’s welcome Dave Gorman and Danny Wallace.”
There is something about almost famous people in person. They’re not larger than life characters to begin with, and so when you meet them, it’s a bit like seeing someone at a party. And so it went. Strangely Danny Wallace (who sat silently during the TV series) had as much to say as Dave Gorman, perhaps making up for lost time. Luckily, they are both automatically funny and so were able to paper over cracks in the presentation.
We were aware from the beginning that Dave would not be doing stand-up – he really would be reading from a book. Amusingly, the audience got to choose between the actual book, a DIY handbook and a book about Heraldry. Luckily for them we chose their book (it would have taken a Herculean moment for anything else) and the two set about reading.
The first section dealt with their first meeting and subsequently how the bet began. For those not in the know, this consisted of Gorman betting Wallace that he could find fifty-four Dave Gormans, including the jokers. A fool task, entirely paid for on a credit card, but instant material for the comedian. Both were clear readers, Gorman’s writing in particular mirroring his stand-up delivery. Wallace’s words exude his obvious journalistic background. The second section, chosen at random spoke of the Israeli Dave Gorman – somewhat prescient.
As if to prove that you can’t get away from anything in the Q&A section, the mood darkened as someone asked why Gorman had cancelled a gig at The Lowery Gallery. It was because he was flying to New York for a six week run in an off-off-Broadway theatre in the seclusion zone....
Yeah! I've had a via from the blog which made me want to start all this in the first place linkmachinego. Thanks for reading...
Blog! Oh Messy Life -- you said it. Another blogger who's stretching the boundries of site design all doodles and tippex.
Sounds Whenever I'm at the supermarket with my parents, we always get separated. I'll be off in the bread isle when they'll disappear into the frozen food. The only way we'll ever find each other is a whistle -- a paticular whistle we only know. My Dad's is the best -- it's loud and turns the heads of all about. By comparison mine is a whisper -- they need to be an isle away before they can hear it -- sometimes just in front. I thought it was just us. But it seems many family have some way of communicating over long distances. This month's Lost and Found sound is 'The Loon Call' a whine which radio producer's Brent Runyon's family have used for generations to call each other to dinner -- which he unfortunately can't replicate. Can I relate...
Music Atomic Kitten due home after attack 'trauma' -- was everybody in New York on Tuesday, apart from in our imaginations? Five kitten mentions down, four to go...
Blog! The most difficult thing over the past few days was discovering how little grasp some people have of international affairs -- how everything has been reduced to 'good guys' and 'bad guys', when in fact the only true evil within this crisis is well, evil. On Thursday /mental.masturbation captured the mood perfectly: "What I fear is not who did this, but who my friends are becoming. What I fear is not death, but cold and senseless revenge. It tears at my heart that it turned so quickly. It turned from, "Are you safe? I want you all to know that I love you." to, "Who the fuck can we bomb?" Knee jerk reactions are to be expected, but how long do they last? When are these intelligent people going to realise that they are screaming for more blood. More death. More destruction. When will they realise that killing more innocents won't bring anyone back from the dead?" Her post from Tuesday describes the day most of us had. This was a moment that unified our lives.
People When President Bush spoke for the first time after the present crisis began he stumbled. At a time when he should have been capturing the spirit of the the moment he described those behind the act as 'folks' -- as though these were a couple of hicks in the wilderness chasing a bird with bazooka guns. Folks!?! It appears this isn't the first time. This article from The Atlantic, published a week ago describe's Bush's other linguistic errors:
"How can a man who says things like, "Laura and I don't realize how bright our children is sometimes until we get an objective analysis"; "My education message will resignate amongst all parents"; "I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family''; and "I want a foreign-handed foreign policy"—how can this verbal sloven be President of the United States?"
On Radio Five this morning one of Bush's ex-employees apologetically expressed the opinion that whilst the Amercian president is not a good public figure, he is a master in private. In times like these we need someone who is an all rounder surely?
"How can a man who says things like, "Laura and I don't realize how bright our children is sometimes until we get an objective analysis"; "My education message will resignate amongst all parents"; "I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family''; and "I want a foreign-handed foreign policy"—how can this verbal sloven be President of the United States?"
On Radio Five this morning one of Bush's ex-employees apologetically expressed the opinion that whilst the Amercian president is not a good public figure, he is a master in private. In times like these we need someone who is an all rounder surely?
Review! Anonymous Juice reviews The Knobs at the Virgin Megastore Listening Booth: "In the Megastore the listening booth was crowded with Geri Halliwell fans. They're a serious bunch: they stand with their legs apart, foreheads bowed, listening intently for the secret parable inside "It's Raining Men" The only two who were actually moving to the music were the dorks my headphones were sandwiched between."
Ugh! The genius behind this boxset must surely have been behind this and this. It's almost as though they've visited the Internet Movie Database and looked for all of the miss-steps in an actors career to collect together for our entertainment. This, however must be aplauded for it's far-sightedness.
TV Turning the classic movie 'Clerks' into a US network cartoon series was a massive job, and a definite risk -- would fans be happy about the toned down dialogue and would the audience understand the in-jokes or humour. Well they didn't and the show was cancelled after just two episodes. And here is one of them available for viewing at IFilm -- Click here -- it's really rather good.