The List:
Have an email read out on @wittertainment.

Film Oh wow, so this happened.

The Set-up:

Dear Mal and Wash,

Just listened to Mark's review of Serenity in a post viewing, hazy miasma (on Sky Cinema rather than an actual cinema) and although it is not a good film I did want to defend at least the central performances from McConaughey, Hathaway etc

Without spoiling the twist that isn't, my impression is that the actors are playing into the requirements of the film's setting and requires performances which hover between a glossy Hollywood style and something altogether more simplistic.

They're doing what is probably expected of them and giving a pitch perfect version of that even if it has no relation to how normal human beings react, because [spoiler spoiler spoiler spoiler and indeed spoiler].

Which isn't to say that it's entirely consistent and the director's other key influence seems to be early 90s erotic thrillers which doesn't make an awful lot of sense given what we learn as the story continues. To say anything else would be too much of a spoiler.

In other words, although this is otherwise a good example of what happens when someone who isn't Christopher Nolan attempts to make a Christopher Nolan film, the Mcconaissance is fully intact as is Hathaway's come back and The Princess Diaries 3 can't come soon enough.

Take care and tinkety-tonkety,

Stuart Ian Burns
Hard fought merit in MA Screen Studies at Manchester University.

The Result:

Well, scroll through to about minute 28 on the podcast.

Yes, that is Simon Mayo reading out the email (including stage directions) and Mark Kermode reacting to it and giving some coherent reasons as to why I'm wrong, or at least being very sympathetic to the performances.

So that happened.  Wow.

5. Have an email read out on @wittertainment.