Wet

Film "As for poor old Orlando Bloom, where does one start to document the tidal wave of wetness which he brings to these proceedings? No matter how much sea water Verbinski throws at the set, nothing gets as damp as Mr Bland, whose expressions run the gamut from perky to peeved with occasional interludes of petulance." -- Mark Kermode reviews Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest

Truly the man is a legend. You can hear the vitriol in what amounts to an audio version of this review on Five Live. He appeared on three different programmes last Friday and seemed to get increasingly annoyed as the day went on, so that by the time he was on Late Review he was simply manic. God knows what'll happen when the third film comes out...