self conscious

People This comment at Metafilter somewhat distils what it might be like to be an attractive woman in the 21st century:
"Junior year of college, I worked at the state capitol. Apparently guys like suits because when I would wait at the bus stop, every. single. day. someone would try to flirt with me. Remember that at this point, I didn't realize this was going to be a constant thing. So I acknowledged that these guys meant well, and I would be friendly enough: I'd smile, or respond to questions.

Except they'd take this as encouragement. [...] So when they'd ask for my number -- and, wow, this was usually after speaking maybe three sentences to me -- I would say, "Oh, sorry," in an embarrassed sort of way, "I have a boyfriend."

And they would say some variation of "he doesn't need to know," which is both insulting to me as a moral being and disrespectful of my turning them down. And if this sounds ridiculous to anyone reading this, all I can tell you is this happened EVERY SINGLE DAY I was at that bus stop and that line came up EVERY TIME except once, when the guy said he just wanted to be my friend when he very clearly did not just want to be my friend because he knew nothing about me except I looked hot in a suit.

But I knew these guys didn't realize how disrespectful they were being, they probably just thought they were being smooth or if they were persistent enough I would be charmed. Misguided. I should not take offence, and I didn't."
It's impossible to read this and not think "Men are assholes..." even if you are one. And the worst part is that she ultimately changed how she looked, what she wore and to an extent her personality simply so she could get on with life and not have to deal with any of this bullshit. If reading this doesn't make you feel self conscious about talking to the opposite sex, well, anywhere, you're not human. Possibly.

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