Computers Every now and then when I've been using the computer for a while an odd smell seems to develop in the room -- a sort of musty smell which goes away when I turn everything off and leave the room for a while. I may not be dreaming as Wired discovers:

"This will be a great surprise to everyone who uses a computer," said Ted Smith, director of the Toxics Coalition. "The chemical industry is subjecting us all to what amounts to chemical trespass by putting these substances into use in commerce. They continue to use their chemicals in ways that are affecting humans and other species."

The article continues with enough long words to frighten the bejesus out of me then ...

"The levels in the dust are enough to raise a red flag, but not enough to create a crisis," said Dr. Gina Solomon, senior scientist at the Natural Resources Defense Council and assistant professor of medicine at University of California, San Francisco. "I have an old computer monitor in front of me now, and I'm not about to throw it away. But when I get a new one, it darn well will be free of these chemicals."

Apparently post 2002 machines should be OK. I bought my computer in 2002. I'm looking at it now in much the same way as the Big Brother UK producers are possibly looking at Kitten right now.

Film Frankly I don't know where to begin with Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Having not entirely been enamoured by the previous two films both of which were far too long to sustain their storyline and didn't have enough humanity to make the viewer care what happened to anyone I went in with a certain forboding. My main, if not only reason for turning up this time was the knowledge that Alfonso Cuarón, who directed the beautiful Great Expectations and thrilling Y Tu Mama Tambian was behind the camera -- I wanted to see if someone with his talent would be submerged within the needs of this kind of franchise. I needn't have worried.

The new Harry Potter film is bloody brilliant.

I know. I can't believe I typed those words either. But its like watching a whole other film series. The closest comparison I can think of is Star Trek : The Motion Picture and The Wrath of Khan. In that case, out went the massive set pieces, the portentious dialogue and the assumption they needed to be answering all of the big questions and in came a revenge drama mixed with a meditation on the legacy of the past -- and so happens here. From the opening moments when Harry is practicing his magic under the covers so as not to attract the attention of his Uncle which is presented in such a way as to imply that he's doing the wizard version of what other teenagers his age might be doing under the covers, its obvious that we're in the hands of a director who has a clear vision how he wants to tell the story of how Potter is growing up. Unlike the previous films were the characters forever felt like puppets wheeled in to speak their lines on cue, here they gain all kinds of dimensions and so we actually care about what happens to them. It's quite a shock -- from watching an animated storybook illustration to a real film. For more evidence watch for the moment when the kids are trapped on the stairs and the new head boy dashes about trying to take charge and is roundly ignored.

Remember in previous films how the Quiddich game was the main feature for nigh on half an hour, with the build up and the sports film style presentation with a beginning, middle and end in which we essentially waited for Harry to win by catching the snitch? Here the game becomes something the kids do as part of their normal school year -- we don't even find out who won (although its implied). Hogwarts the school has developed into somewhere which feels like a real place rather than a bunch of sets and for the first time we even have a sense of the geography of the place. And perhaps more significantly the costume design has become more varied, with Harry and friends in their civies more often and Haggrid in particular displaying a greater wardrobe.

Is it all down to Cuaron? Well the scriptwriter Steven Kloves is the same as on previous projects (perhaps he was happy to have greater flexibility), and its widely acknowledged that is the best novel of the series. But we welcome as photographer Michael Seresin, whose previous work includes Angela's Ashes, Birdy, Fame, Bugsy Malone and Midnight Express and there are some similarity in the camerawork with those films -- the pallete in particular which includes blue and greens in comparision to the reds and browns of the past. Its more fluid, with greater use of hand held and steadicam. Throughout you feel like you're in the action instead of watching from the outside. Its visceral to an impressive degree.

But the real improvement is in the performances. Its still an British character actor's convention but even they seem to be having fun this time with more dramatic performances. David Thewlis as Lupin and Gary Oldman as Sirius Black prove yet again why they're continually hired to play the grey areas in us all -- both share some very touching scenes with Daniel Radcliffe as Harry, as does Maggie Smith. But they're greatly helped by the fact that this time they have something to bounce off, because the kids have gown up slightly and actually give proper performances. Radcliffe shows the power bubbling under, especially in the Gilliamesque opening scenes. Rupert Grint's Ron Weasly used to be a collection of facial expressions. They're still there, but now he has something behind the eyes even though on this occasion he's mainly the fall guy. The real revelation is Emma Watson who given the chance to relax and probably offers the performance of the film as Hermione, suddenly a kickass, passionate, intelligent role model -- no longer the annoying, grump know-it-all.

So I loved it and can't wait to see it again so that I can pick up on all the details I missed. Two things can happen from here -- it's either going to be the turning point in the franchise as later episodes make the first two as reductive as The Phantom Menace or it'll be the aboration, the good one, the Live and Let Die of the Roger Moore James Bonds. My great fear now as I await The Goblet of Fire is that it'll be back to business as usual, the magic of this one bleeding away. It's being directed by Mike Newell who on the one hand has made things like Enchanted April and Awfully Big Adventure which would suggest something in the old mood. But he also made Four Weddings and Donnie Brascoe so it could go either way ...

Relationships Just when you think that nothing could help confirm what those people think net users are like, you run into discussion such as this one at Slashdot. Actually some of the talk is quite witty and takes the topic in its stride. But then you stumble across the following:

"it's simple. your woman, and even your life, can be viewed as a game. instead of working hard to score in a game, work hard to score with your woman... instead of exploring levels of some fake world, figure out what places you can take your woman to in the real world that get her in the mood. figure out how to get her to do x and y things that she would never think of doing."

What repulses me? Well, the merging of reality and gaming is fairly shocking, as is the objectification of the significant other. I just want it to be irony but unfortunately it seems to be missing. Somewhat intrigued though, by the length and breadth of the rest of the discussion ... [via Cruel the reading of which possibly opens me up accusations that include the nouns and adjectives 'pot', 'kettle' and 'black']

Film Who would have thought that had franchise potential:

"Cate Blanchett is expected to take the throne again and star in the epic - based on Queen Elizabeth I - which has the working title of Golden Age. "It is about the battle between her life as a monarch and her personal life," Shekhar Kapur said. "It ends in the destruction of the Spanish Armada on the larger level."

So at what point does she turn into Judi Dench?

Blogging There sometimes isn't anything more painful than watching mainstream media trying to explain what a weblog is and why people do it. Actually there sometimes isn't anything more painful than watching me trying to explain what a weblog is and why people do it. But I digress. Suw Charman appeared on the BBC World Service the other week in quite a carefully researched piece and managed to get in terms like Moblogging and Blogisphere. And now the contrast as Wendy McLure appears in a piece for Fox News which is about what you'd expect. Here, Wendy hilariously blogs the report (with screenshots). Choice example of Fox's voiceover:

""The term 'blog' is a shortened version of 'weblog.' They've been around for years but just recently thousands of people have used those sites to catalog the details of their lives on webpages created for them, by them."

Eh? [via RB]

Life As you can tell I'm in a more boyant mood today (which is odd considering (a) I went back to work (b) I've just sat through the Woody Allen film Another Woman which basically says your life is over by the age of fifty). I'm also flooding my room with daylight now that I've been able to fight my blind open through all the plants and rocks I've got on my window ledge. Being this high up in the tower block without trees to block the sunbeams, waking up in the morning the rays splashing against my face this morning was a refreshing experience.

People Julia Roberts pregnant with twins. Somewhere along the line I forgot she was married ...

Film Kevin Smith's film Clerks is going to be celebrated in September with a three disc dvd boxset. I've been watching this develop over the months from being idea to something special. The latest grin worthy news is that the 'lost scene' from the script (ie, what happened in the funeral home to make Dante and Randell run out so fast) previously available in comic book form has now been animated in the same style as the cartoon series specially for this release. The background and screenshots are here. With this and talk of including the tv pilot which Smith knew nothing about until someone sent him the tape, this is going to very special.

H2G2 I know this has already been heavily circulated but just in case anyone did miss it, the screenwriter that isn't Douglas on the new film interviewed himself for the official site's weblog. Here is an example of his approach to the material:

"Next, I read the book with pen and highlighter in hand, underlining passages that had been left out that I wanted to try to get back in and making notes on characters and themes that were present in the book but not really playing as well as they could in the screenplay. I was going to watch the TV show, but Jay suggested that I not do that, just so that I wouldn?t have any of those images in my head. The idea was to try to create something rather than re-create (and I don?t think we have the rights to any new material created specifically for the TV show, so for that reason, I never watched it. Do you hear me BBC? I NEVER WATCHED THE TV SERIES). I did, however, buy a book that had the scripts for the radio plays. When I started writing, I had the novel on one side of my G4 laptop and the radio play scripts on the other side. They are both well-worn."

Overall it's a staggeringly long, revealing and passionate self justification which just about wins me over that he does know what he's doing. On hearing that people would be doing re-writes I was petrified that I wouldn't recognise any of the dialogue (some of which Adams carried from media to media to media --"What's so terrible about being drunk?" "Ask a glass of water...") but most of what Kirkpatrick has done is structural. As Douglas said the main problem with turning the thing into a film is that you destroy the Earth at the end of the first act -- where do you go from there? Maybe we'll finally have the answer...

Fashion The always, ahem, interesting Lucire becomes the next website to go real world with a magazine in newsagents. It's not the first (see Chud which publishes Movie Insider) but they've taken the step of putting the prototype May issue online in .pdf format and are asking readers for their input. How well can they do in an already crowded market place and is it significantly different for us to care?

Wiki In an attempt to give myself some research practice I've been doing some work on the new look Wikipedia. Just to be particular random, I'm creating new entries for all the people in the Have I Got News For You episode guide who aren't already indexed. It's the kind of writing I used to do all the time at college and in work and while I know the value is fairly limited (except for tv historians and fans of that show) its actually more of a challenge in producing something coherent outside of my field of reference.

One issue I've encountered is how copyrighted some material is and whether simply rewriting a profile from the website of a performer's agent with added sections constitutes the creation of something new or plagarism. You can ponder that as you learn about Kate Saunders, Gill Pyrah, Russell Davies (not that one) and Dillie Keane. Can anyone suggest which Martin Young this is?

Computers On the upside, I've finally sorted out my computer problems after an oblique reference in a page linked from this thread at Ask Metafilter. I had been infected by the Look2Me adware which kept hijacking my browser, sucked up cpu and slowed my processor. Kill2Me seems to have done the trick. I'm touching wood as I type this (and no sniggering). That'll teach me download freeware I didn't need from a site I've never heard of.

Life I go back to work tomorrow after my week off ill. I feel empty. I'm always wanting to be doing something but all I've been able to do is stay in bed, feet up watching television (well videos) hoping I get better in time for the next day. But it hasn't been a holiday -- other than a brief trip out for a paper in the latter stages of the week I haven't been anywhere just looked at the same four walls. Its been better the last couple of days -- being able to write something here and there, that's been helpful. But other than my health I wish I had something else to show for the past seven days of my life.

TV Eight or nine years ago I got a phone call from Tris. He asked me if I'd been watching this american sitcom because he'd been sitting around with his family trying to work out the lyrics. We sat on the phone and sang our way through as best we could but there was one which made no sense to either of us.
'You're job's a joke, yer broke, your love life's na na ne ...'
There were letters but it didn't make sense. So I got off the phone got a video out. Fast forwarded through the teaser and ...
'You're job's a joke, yer broke, your love life's Deeeooowaa...'
I rang him back.
'They sing deeeooowaaa.'
'What's deeeooowaaa. Oh DOA'
' "You're love life's DOA" Dead on arrival? That still doesn't make any sense. And it doesn't sound very nice.'
'But at least we can understand it now.' He said goodbye and hung up.
An hour ago Fani rang. We talked through a few problems we were both having and I reminded her that the last episode of the same show was on tonight. I don't think she was ever a fan -- just something on in the background when she was getting ready to go out. But I managed talk her into watching. The phone calls at opposite ends of a decade with people who think of the programme in different ways. Both with Friends.

It's actually a shock to think that it's finally over. Of course the final episode (written by the creators) was exactly what it should be. Within the forty-five or so minutes all of the plotlines and character arcs which have developed over the past ten years came to fruition. I love that Ross and Rachel ... y'know. That Monica got to win again and made a mess doing it. That Chandler was able to square being a dufus with being in a good strong marriage. That Joey came to terms with the changes (although were will the new chick and duck go when he heads off to spin-off land). And that Phoebe found the man you loved her kookiness. But more than that it was a celebration of everything we've loved about the show. Hell, Gunther even had his moment finally telling Rachel he loved her screwing up Ross's chance to do the same in all its first seasoness. About the only things missing were a monkey, an ugly naked guy, a flashback and a final visit to Central Perk for Joey to say something stupid. And more importantly it didn't try to be anything but an episode of the same show. It didn't throw out the formula which had made it popular for years or try and make some big statement. It made just made us laugh. And that's always been the point.

[I wanted to write something longer and more insightful but Lucy Mangan and David Aaronovitch got there before me. So read what they said instead. Mangan's experience is frighteningly similar to mine.]

Film Watching the Clooney / Kidman explosion-fest The Peacemaker in the middle of my malaise the other night it occured to me that this was the first time I'd watched anything panned & scanned in months. With the fact that Sky Movies are showing everything in the correct ratio and I only seem to watch dvds it's not surprising. Now it seems Blockbuster in the US are catching up as well. Now if only terrestrial broadcasters would follow. Even on BBC4, if a film is in anything thinner that 16:9 its blown up to fit the widescreen. Shame.

Scene Unseen: Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone: Harry and Hagrid

Film I never caught the crest of the Harry Potter wave. I don't read a lot of fiction and I've found the films to be a bit meandering, lacking strong plotting, which is fine for kids but as an adult I was a bit fidgety both times. Which is why I was amazed to find what is a really strong deleted scene on the dvd for The Philosopher's Stone. Once you've fought your way through the utterly incomprehensible game which passes for the menu system and seems designed to stop anybody from seeing them.

Something which both films do really well is the conflict between reality and magic. This is an old fashioned boarding school with all the petty rivalries and discipline but they teach wizardry. What I would have liked to have seen more of is the places in which the real world and this magic realm interact. Like the moment when Potter household fills up with letters from Hogwarts or when Harry argues with the station clerk about the existence of Platform 9 3/4.

So it's utterly surprising to find this deleted moment in which Harry and Hagrid sit hunched in a standard London Tube on their way to the station. Hagrid looks utterly incongruous in the space and including it would have underlined how different this place Potter is going to will be. It's an appealing image and one I would have like to have seen more of. We'll see what happens in the new film out this weekend -- it is directed by T Tu Mama Tambien's Alfonso Curzon -- which is a really appealing prospect.

[other photos from the deleted scenes can be found here]

TV After watching the first show tonight (which featured at least one moment which should be in the best bits at the end) I can only assume the production meeting at Big Brother this year took place at the local pub after many beers ...

Producer #1: You know what I'm sick of.
Producer #2: Woh?
Producer #1: The press. They keep slating us every year for picking boring housemates.
Producer #2: Yeah. Bastards.
Producer #1: I mean look at Tickle. He was funny wasn't he?
Producer #2: Yeah.
Producer #1: And Jade Goody.
Producer #2: Yeah.
Producer #1: All they seem to want is sex and violence.
Producer #2: Vio - viol -- fightin'
Producer #1: You know what we should do this year?
Producer #2: Woh?
Producer #1: Give them what they want.
Producer #2: Yeah!
Producer #1: We'll ditch the twelve we've already got. Apart from the art student.
Producer #4: Will you stop going on about Shell. What kind of a name is that?
Producer #3: You fancy her la la la ...
Producer #1: Shut up and go back to sleep.
Producer #3: Got any nuts?
Producer #1: No. What was I saying.
Producer #4: Ditching eleven.
Producer #1: Right. And keeping Shell. Anway, the idea is ... we'll pick people who've spent their whole life trying to avoid each other. Like that one Marco -- the one who was madder than Dowling. The screamer. We'll stick him in with ... Ahmed.
Producer #4: The self confessed homophobe! But aren't they both lawyers. Oooh interesting. (rubs hands together) This is good. Pass me a napkin and pen so I can write them down. Thanks.
Producer #1: Who next, oh hold what about ... what was his name .... "the shagger from the shire".
Producer #4: Not the hobbit that came in?
Producer #1: No. Jason.
Producer #3: No.
Producer #1: Yes.
Producer #2: Yes. Err....
Producer #4: Yes.
Producer #1: He's in. Didn't seem like too much of an exhibitionist. So we need someone to add contrast .. erm ...
Producer #4: What about Daniel ...
Producer #1: Who was? Oh the hairdresser. Who likes seducing straight men. But isn't that two Gay men?
Producer #4: Yes. Well. Yes. But put them next to Ahmed.
Producer #1: Nightmare. Now we're getting somewhere. How many is that so far?
Producer #3: One ... two ... Three!
Producer #1: Four. Something about four though. Four A-Levels ... Stuart. He said he was intelligent. So he must be. So we'll have to have him in the house. (finishes pint. Thinks for a moment. Looks at glass.) We need more beer.
Producer #5: (incredulous) It's your round.
Producer #1: I'm thinking. I do all my best thinking when I'm pissed ....
Producer #5: It's a wonder you can be so coherent.
Producer #5 slopes off towards the bar.
Producer #1: What special interest groups haven't we covered. The black political type.
Producer #4: Victor.
Producer #1: Victor! Now there is something missing.
Producer #3: Girls ... ha ha ha ha ha
Producer #2: Ha ha ha ha
Producer #1: We've got Shell. What else do we need?
Producer #4: Five more.
Producer #1: Ok ... ok ... well my girl will need someone to talk to. An equal. Someone who could almost be her sister. How about ... Vanessa?
Producer #4: Why her?
Producer #1: Oh any random blonde will do. Plus she was born in South Africa so there is that international element.
Producer #4: But won't people get confused between her and Shell?
Producer #1: Their accents are different. See. That works. Write it down.
Producer #5 returns from bar with beers.
Producer #3: Did they have any nuts?
Producer #5: You didn't ask for any.
Producer #3: Please, ple-ple-please.
Producer #5: Uhhh. (storms back towards bar) Isn't it funny how I'm not drinking and I'm the one buying all the beer?
Producer #1: Remember we had that bet were we said we couldn't find anyone in the auditions who could be outwitted by Helen from BB Two?
Producer #4: No. Oh you mean the bet I WON!
Producer #1: Yes. Well how about we put Emma in with this lot.
Producer #4: That's evil.
Producer #1: Yes! But we've got to make sure we edit her interview footage so that she looks particularly stupid otherwise people aren't going to buy it. Now I don't want Shell to be lonely and I know we've already put Vanessa in but how about we put that really cute weblogger in. The one who works in web design and spends lots of time in coffee houses -- the one has lots of cats. They can have girly chats.
Producer #4: Kitten.
Producer #1: Kitten. She was really nice. The public are really going to like her. But make sure we don't pick the wrong one.
Producer #4: No. Grrr. I hate that girl. She was mean to me.
Producer #1: Me too. She made signs. With her fingers. How many slots have we got left?
Producer #4: Two. Now I don't really want to bring it up because you know I don't want you to think that it's because I'm a lesbian. But I think that since you've got Marco and Daniel that there should be some equality. Even up the numbers.
Producer #1: But we tried all that in BB One.
Producer #4: Yes but ...
Producer #1: How about a bi? Someone with a boyfriend but likes flirting with girls. Michelle?
Producer #4: (steaming) You're only picking her because her name is Michelle as well.
Producer #1: Is it? So it is. But she did say she wanted to be glamour model.
Producer #4: (relaxing). Oh. Oh yeah. Erm .... the tabloids are going to love her.
Producer #1: How many is that.
Producer #5: They didn't have any nuts. I bought you some Pork Scratchings. Hello. Hello?
Producer #4: He's asleep again.
Producer #5 (sitting down): What have I missed?
Producer #4: We're up to eleven.
Producer #1: I'm stuck. Pass us a scratching.
Producer #5: Who have you got. The napkin? (reads) Right. Right.... that should be good. I hope that's the Kitten I'm thinking of ... That's create some arguments.
Producer #1: So you like it.
Producer #5: Should be some sex and violence going on in there.
Producer #1: That's what we thought. So who do you think is missing?
Producer #5: You're actually asking my opinion for a change?
Producer #1: Yes. My head ...
Producer #5: OK. Nadia...
Producer #1: Nadia?
Producer #4: Which?
Producer #5: Well what you've got here are a series of degrees ... sexual orientation, political belief, some would say attractiveness. I'm sober and I couldn't have picked better list. But what you need is someone in the middle who crosses all the boundaries and covers all the basis. Nadia is your girl.
Producer #4: Nadia ....
Producer #1: The Portugese virgin. The international thing like Vanessa. She's perfect. Well done! Pass us the napkin and I'll phone Davina and tell 'er ....
Producer #4: Doesn't he know she's a ...
Producer #5: It'll be funnier if we don't tell him ...
Producer #4: Look I've got a few concerns. I just went along with him because he's pissed. Won't the press just say that we're pandering to them in order to get coverage. And aren't fans going to say that we're just trying to create pressure cooker and throwing out the idea that this is all an experiment. And aren't the public going to hate us anyway because there isn't anyone to like in there. Couldn't it all go horribly wrong?
Producer #5: Yes, but then he'll get fired and we'll get to do it our way, Early night?

Life I'll be blogging again when my pc gets better and the cold which is keeping me off work goes away.

Who Yes, yes, Billie Piper is the new Doctor Who companion. Oh look it could have been a lot, lot worse. She's a name and apart from anything else Russell T Davies isn't stupid. Out of the hundreds of actresses going after the part if she's perfect, that's fine by me (plus it might mean I'll be able sell off the copy of her first single which I somehow procured when it was released to a mad Whovian on Ebay finally. Look it wasn't may fault ... oh ... err ....)

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